That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize