Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Dick very happy bro
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
