you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Randomize
