Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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