There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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