She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize