Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
