hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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