He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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