I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I didn't notice because vodka
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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