You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize