Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
So gin and wine won't be happening again
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
