I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
