this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
