you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
