I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
It's just like the Real World with babies
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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