also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
whose parrot is this?
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
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