Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
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