Just cropdusted the office
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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