Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
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