i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
