was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
