Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
