Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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