I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
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