do herpes really smell.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
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