Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry hahfunny hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(415): View more from California

i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian

Fav 8 2229 1189
share tweet
(609): View more from New Jersey

Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win

Fav 43 952 4338
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(318): View more from Louisiana

So my game is weak??

(501): View more from Arkansas

If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.

Fav 10 1365 3837
share tweet
(952): View more from Minnesota

I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.

Fav 55 11119 1681
share tweet
(630): View more from Illinois

Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard

Fav 7 3141 1204
share tweet
(610): View more from Pennsylvania

We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha

Fav 4 1824 850
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(713): View more from Texas

screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.

Fav 4 1897 1694
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(413): View more from Massachusetts

Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad

Fav 1 576 806
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(401): View more from Rhode Island

Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?

Fav 1 65 21
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT