Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
