Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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