It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
