My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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