That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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