So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
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