Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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