pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
