is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
