Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
