dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
