Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
