Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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