recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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