I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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