If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
