farters have to be the big spoon...
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
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Help. Why am I so naked?
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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