yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
These tits shall not be calmed
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
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