I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Never joke about your clitoris.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
