put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
