This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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