I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
3 2 1 whiskey
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
