and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
Small penises have feelings too.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
