I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I just want nice things and good sex
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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