Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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