Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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